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The Power of the Pussy by Kara King: Book Review.


When I first came across this book, I was in one of those reflective slumps we all experience now and then. Another fizzled-out relationship, a streak of dodgy dates, and the creeping question of whether I should just give up on romance altogether and take up knitting. While scrolling aimlessly one evening, this book popped up, and I’ll admit the title had me hooked. It was cheeky, a little bit scandalous, and exactly the kind of distraction I needed.


The book is bold, to say the least. Kara King doesn’t mince her words as she lays out her philosophy: know your worth, set boundaries, and never settle for less than you deserve. One of my favourite lines from the book was something like this:

"Confidence is king, if you love yourself and value yourself, men will too. If relationships are about the most beautiful women, then Kim Kardashian wouldn't be twice divorced. Accept yourself for who you are. Get a grip on your self-esteem".

I love that part so much because I love her style of straight talk, no BS advice. It’s brimming with confidence and sass, a bit like having your fiercest mate whispering in your ear, “You’re a queen. Act like it.”



I love that Kara encourages women to fall in love with themselves, flaws and all.

She then emphasises the importance of falling in love with someone who treats you well (because if you don't love yourself, how would you convince a stranger that you are loveable?), and she even includes exercises to help you figure out exactly what you want in a partner.

One of these is the “dream man” checklist, which I had a laugh attempting. My list ended up being so idealistic that I’m fairly sure Mr Darcy himself would’ve fallen short. Still, it’s a helpful exercise to clarify what truly matters to you.


That said, not everything landed for me. Some of the advice felt like it belonged in a teenage romance novel, stuff like always hanging up the phone first to seem aloof. I tried something similar once, deciding not to text first after what I thought was a fantastic date. Long story short, he didn’t text either. Was I playing hard to get, or was I just ghosted? Either way, I learned that games don’t always lead to the happy ending you’re hoping for. But to be fair to Kara, she explained not to take being "ghosted" personally. The right person for you wouldn't ghost you!


The book isn’t without its critics, and I can see why. Some readers argue that it leans too much into manipulation and power dynamics rather than encouraging genuine, mutual respect in relationships.

One scathing review I came across called it “a guide to playing mind games,” suggesting the tactics wouldn’t work on emotionally mature men. I think many men will not like this book.

I am a woman and well, I tend to agree with the critics on this point because it’s hard to build something meaningful when your foundation is a series of calculated moves.

And besides this, there are some of us women who are just not good at playing games or being manipulative because we wear our hearts on our sleeves or we are just not built that way. Adopting a lot of Kara's advice will seem unnatural and forced to us, removing us from who we are. Is it worth it?




Stylistically, the writing is straightforward, if a bit unpolished. It reads more like a chat with a fiery friend than a polished piece of literature, which works in its favour if you’re looking for something light and conversational. It’s not the kind of book that will win any literary awards in my opinion, but it delivers its message with clarity and plenty of sass.


For all its quirks, I found myself walking away with a refreshed sense of self-worth. The book’s strongest message; that you’re valuable and should never settle for less than you deserve is timeless.

One thing about books is that they all have their place and this book has its place. Books, movies, music, stories etc these things are relatable based on what we go through in life and where we are in life.

While you might not find a book relatable at one phase in your life, perhaps because you are in love and happily secured in a relationship, you might find yourself single a year later, unlucky in love and finding that same book to be the most relatable material you have ever come across in your existence. What was once "cringe", now all of a sudden makes sense and now makes you emotional, maybe you even cry a little bit.

Read it with an open mind, and maybe a glass of wine. At the very least, it’s a light-hearted, cheeky reminder to prioritise yourself and if you want to use it as a step-by-step guide to everlasting love, do come back and let me know if it works.


If you enjoy this kind of honest book talk, pop over to my blog, Read Read Rant. It’s my little online corner where I share book reviews, opinions, and the occasional rant. Whether a book made me laugh, cry, or want to hurl it across the room, you’ll hear about it.

I do try to be mindful of revealing spoilers in my reviews, this is why I also created a separate space where spoilers are fine. Come and join me on WhatsApp or my blog site, let’s build a community of book lovers who aren’t afraid to share their thoughts and maybe discover their next favourite read together.

 

 
 
 
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